Austin Powers 2: The Spy who Shagged Me (1999)

I was largely hoodwinked into seeing this, as it was very popular at the US box office, where the original wasn't. So I thought maybe it might be something of an improvement. The general consensus now seems to be that it's much worse than the original. This movie has very little plot, is mostly laughably acted (for the wrong reasons), is poorly directed, has poor choreography, has a boring script, features many tired and inferior repeats of ideas from the first movie, and isn't funny, unless you consider someone drinking the faeces of a fat Scottish oaf who likes eating babies to be funny.
The "plot" goes like this: Dr Evil, who's still having problems with his son, is determined to destroy Austin Powers, so travels back in time and steals his "mojo", with the help of the flatulent gargantuan porridge eater Fat Bastard. This has no noticable effect on Powers, who nevertheless goes back in time himself using a rival time machine developed by Basil Exposition (just what the hell was Michael York doing in this role??), stops Dr Evil and his plan to hold the world to ransom with a giant laser, and makes out with a few women (including CIA agent Felicity Shagwell, who must surely be the most god-awful character ever conceived. It's just lucky that Heather Graham isn't quite as bad an actress as Liz Hurley.) Oh yes, and Dr Evil has a cloned smaller version of himself called Mini-Me, who I suppose is just about acceptable. Also Tim Robbins is excellent as usual as the US President, but that doesn't really count as he's only in it for about ten seconds. The choreography as I say is pretty bad. Austin and Felicity dance a few times, but are frankly crap at it, and the fight scenes on the Jerry Springer show are poorly executed. The script was pretty bad, and would have been even had I got all the pop culture references, which I didn't because unfortunately I'm not twelve.
The most depressing thing about this movie is that everyone else in the theatre appeared to be loving it, which raises the ugly prospect of further sequels. Please, Mr Myers, don't. Actually though I have nothing against Mike Myers, who's clearly raking in the cash. This movie is aimed at a particular type of "person", who probably watches Jerry Springer and reads the Sun, and has the innate stupidity necessary to endure this kind of rubbish without feeling sick.

(no stars)

The Players:

Mike Myers as Austin Powers, Dr Evil and Fat Bastard
Heather Graham as Felicity Shagwell
Verne Troyer as Mini-Me
Michael York as Basil Exposition
and a host of almost universally useless others, with the exception of Tim Robbins and Kristen Johnston

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written by Ed in August 1999