Phoebe: You know, you should go outside and be with the three-dimensional people
Joey: The tough thing is she really wants to have sex with me.
Chandler: Crazy bitch
Rachel: I think that bitch cracked my tooth
Phoebe: I don't understand. How can you be straight? You're so funny and smart and you... you throw such great Academy Award parties
Ross: You're over me? When...when...when were you under me?
Rachel: Well, you were pretty damn good.
Chandler: Interesting, because in my dreams I'm surprisingly inadequate.
Joey: You waited too long to make your move, and now you're in 'The Friend
Zone'
Ross: No no no, I'm not in the Zone
Joey: Ross, you're mayor of the Zone
listen to it (112 KB)
Ross: It's not like I didn't try to tell you, but there was always something! Like... like Italian guys or... or ex-fiancés...or...or...or Italian guys.
Monica: Oh look...when it started, I was just trying to be nice to her bacause she was my brother's girlfriend. But then one thing led to another, and before I knew it... we were shopping. But we only did it once. And it didn't mean anything to me. Really, I was thinking of you the whole time.
Phoebe: She'll kill you, Monica. She'll kill you like a dog in the street.
Rachel: I need to not be with you right now
Joey: I've got two words for you. "Threesome"
Phoebe: You know, that's not fair. I don't make fun of the stuff you guys believe in. Like...Joey with his Bermuda Triangle thing, and...Ross with his evolution.
Joey: She's totally good looking. I mean, if I met her at a bar or something, I'd be buying her breakfast...you know, after having slept with her.
Ross: Is this one of those things where you break up with a guy and then I
tell you what I really think and then the next day you get back together and I
feel like an idiot?
episode 2.1
Joey: Look, I can tell when women are depressed and vulnerable; it's one of my gifts.
Monica: For the sixteenth time, I don't think you're obsessive.
Monica: Alright, tell me if this is too cute: lesbian wedding..chicken breasts.
Joey: It just seems so futile. All these women and...nothing. It's like I'm Superman without my powers. I have the cape, and yet I cannot fly.
Chandler: Now you understand how I feel every single day. Thw whole world is my lesbian wedding.
Phoebe (Monica asked her to guess what she was thinking): Oh. Okay: How it's been so long since you've had sex, you wonder if they've changed it? Was I even close?
Chandler: Look, if I'm going to be a lonely old guy, I'm going to need a thing. A hook. Like the guy in the subway who eats his face. I'm thinking I could be the crazy man with a snake. "Crazy Snake Man." Heh? Then I'll get more snakes and call them "my babies." Kids won't walk past my place, they'll run. "Run away from 'Crazy Snake Man!'" they'll shout.
Phoebe (to Rachel): All right. Tell us about the kiss. Was it like a soft brush against your lips? Or a kind of I've-gotta-have-you-now sort of thing?
Joey (asking Ross about the same kiss): Tongue?
episode 2.8
Phoebe: Okay, hi. This is a song about a love triangle between three people
I made up. It's called "Two of Them Kissed Last Night."
episode 2.8